I Traded My iPhone for a Basic Phone
Breaking free from the scroll and its exhaustion.
Last Wednesday at 11 p.m., I ordered a basic cell phone from Amazon with just two features: Calling and Texting. And honestly, that’s all I need.
Why?
For months, I’ve been tormented by my phone usage. Every time I’m scrolling, there’s this little voice at the back of my mind whispering: “Put it down, you could be doing something better with your time.” That voice also never misses a chance to remind me that whenever I’m irritable or impatient, it might be because I’ve spent too much time glued to my phone. It drains my energy, and I refuse to admit it. Instead, I blame my poor sleep (Which is probably caused by my doom scrolling before bed). But deep down, I knew the truth. It just took me months to get to a point where I just couldn’t ignore that voice anymore. So, I had to do something.
I’m a tired mother, and I often say that being tired means you’re doing meaningful things. Often that’s true. But there’s another kind of tiredness no one really talks about: the exhaustion that comes from being online for no reason, distracting myself from the real work I should be doing or the rest I should be seeking.
The switch
Before the switch, I tracked my screen time. I needed to see numbers, I needed to see just how bad it was. I chose the day before I ordered the phone. That day, I had used my phone for 5 hours and 38 minutes. To be fair, much of it was “passive use”: Calls, YouTube, Spotify for podcasts or news. Still, seeing it laid out in numbers was sobering. You can see the trend from previous days and how it dropped after I got the phone.
The phone arrived on Thursday. It’s ugly and heavy, which instantly makes me want to limit my interaction with it. Perfect. I was thrilled to slip my SIM card in and turn that iPhone off. The moment I did, I felt a deep sense of relief. That made me think of how self-help books and podcasts often claim that change occurs in a single moment. And that was it for me. Because right then, I knew for sure: there’s no going back. I’m no longer a scroller chasing my next dopamine hit, I’m already someone new.
This measure may seem drastic, but believe me, I have tried everything. I turned my screen grayscale, turned off notifications, blocked apps, deleted apps, and even hid my phone away. And yet, I always ended up back at square one as soon as my motivation faded (Which usually takes 48 hours at the most).
Honestly, I am starting to sound like a junkie. Maybe I am. Maybe I’m addicted to my phone. Which is extremely hard to admit, I am not a teenager, I’m a grown woman, raising kids, making sure meals are healthy, running a household. I am supposed to have my shit together. But maybe I’ve been in denial. And part of that denial came from how I used my phone. I kept telling myself that as long as I don’t have IG or TikTok, I am fine! As if avoiding the “short attention span” apps is the solution. Instead, I scrolled on Reddit, Substack, listened to podcasts, and audiobooks. By intellectualizing my phone use, I managed to justify it. But the pattern was the same: I couldn’t put the phone down.
How People Reacted?
When I told my friends and family that I don’t have a smartphone anymore, just an old, ugly phone, and that I’d be reachable only by direct calls or good old SMS, they all had the same reaction: “Oh wow, that’s amazing! What a great idea! Clearly, this is good for you, phones are so hard to put down.” They all got it. They all understood, instantly, and it felt like they all had the same little internal dialogue I’ve lived with. As if they, too, have been struggling with their phone habits, but no one talks about it.
So when I said, “I’m not using my smartphone anymore. No FaceTime, no WhatsApp, no videos. If you need me, call me directly. I need to step back.” I expected some pushback, some whining, but they all got in line and gave a thumbs up (which is unusual with my family and friends. We love to debate everything. Apparently, in this one, we are all aligned).
Now What?
It’s only been 5 days since I went smartphone-free, and already, some changes are showing up in my life.
My mood and energy: Before, when I had my smartphone, by the time my toddler finally fell asleep, I was done. Completely drained. My battery was empty, and I couldn’t stand any interaction. My husband and son knew that about me, so they’d always give me space in the evenings.
But now, it’s different. After I put her to sleep, I still have energy left. I find myself talking, tidying up a little, maybe even meal-prepping, or just enjoying some late-night chitchat. I never once thought my phone had anything to do with that end-of-day exhaustion. I always assumed it was just the natural toll of being with a toddler all day. Turns out, it wasn’t only that, the phone was draining me, too.
Thinking: I can think again. Not just surface thoughts, not just the first idea that pops into my head, I can actually follow a thought deeper. I used to believe I gave myself time to think, but the truth is, I didn’t. The process was always interrupted by either a FaceTime call or some random thing I had to Google, which led to checking Substack, then scrolling Twitter to catch up on the news, and just like that, the thought was gone, evaporated, lost.
Even at the playground with my kids or while cooking a meal, I’d have an audiobook or podcast running. During breakfast, while the kids worked on their school assignments, I’d scroll through my phone, “FOR ME TIME”. My brain was always filled with something.
Now, all I have are my thoughts. I just cook. I just eat. I just watch them. And I think.
Enjoying more time with my kids. Don’t get me wrong: I love my kids, I love spending time with them. But there comes a point during the day when all I want is to be no one’s mom, preferably curled up in some forgotten corner, scrolling through my phone in peace.
By mid-afternoon, I was impatient, easily frustrated, and had little patience for my children’s small realizations or random stories. I would just nod and smile, pretending to listen. Often, I’d have an audiobook or podcast running in the background, that’s where my full attention was, while being only physically present with them.
One of the reasons I chose to homeschool my children was to spend more time with them. And rather than fully engaging with them every day, I would steal some hours away just to scroll on my phone.
If someone had told me, “You’d be a better mother if you put your phone down,” I would’ve snapped back, “I’m already a good mother!” That anger would’ve come from the truth buried in the statement. Because now, just five days later, I am a better mother. In fact, I’m a better person.
And you? Do you have that little voice as well? Tell me in the comments, I think many of us are carrying the same struggle but rarely say it out loud.